The best way to take care of your heart is to not disturb it. Originally, the Creator programmed it to be a beautiful place for physical, spiritual, and emotional growth. But we don’t keep it that way; we disturb it. We don’t have to do anything to make the heart good. As long as we keep our hands off the heart, it is pure because it comes with total unconditional love. But somehow, we inject our ego and then we spoil the whole thing.
As you know, the first thing babies do when they are born is to cry. You know why? They are in communication with God at the time, and they look to God and say, Why are you sending me into this crazy insane asylum? They are not going to spare me. Very soon they will spoil me because they are all spoiled. That’s why the baby comes crying. But, we are very happy. We have one more addition to our insane asylum! The baby comes crying, we are happy. After living a long time the baby says, Enough of all these problems; I’m getting out of it. What do we do? We cry. When the baby comes crying, we laugh, and when the baby goes laughing, we cry!
The heart gets disturbed mainly because of the ego. We find it very hard to keep the heart steady, calm, and peaceful. People often ask me, “I’m so upset. How can I let go of this? This relationship is really so distressing, how can I detach from it?” But they don’t ask any questions like this: “Oh, this pot is so very hot, should I drop it? It’s burning my hand, should I drop it? It really hurts so much! Can you tell me if I drop it?” Oh boy! If it burns enough would you be asking my permission?
If you know you have to leave a relationship, but don’t know how, then it is not burning enough. If it burns you enough, you would not be asking the question. You would just drop it. So hold on until you get burnt well. Or, make it cool. Either drop it, or cool it. It all depends upon your capability. If you can cool the hot pot then you can hold on to it longer but if you can’t, then drop it. Your self-esteem is more important. Actually, that’s why we get into relationships, partnerships, and marriage—either to get hot or to get cool. If the relationship is very cool, keep holding, but if it is very hot, then drop it. Now and then, a little hot will naturally come in to make you warm. Warmth is okay, but hot is dangerous. When two people come together they give warmth to each other. They should not give a lot of heated agitation to each other. So, know your limitation and know your capacity. If you really can’t take it, then be yourself, but remember, God provides you with that partner for you to learn something. It’s not that you selected them. God provided this person to be your partner for you to learn from the relationship. So learn your lessons properly. Don’t try to escape. It’s a test, and you have to pass the test. Don’t immediately run away from the examination hall!
The secret to success is living from the heart and staying away from the “I, me, mine” mentality. The heart is always pure. The head is what creates lots of problems. What is the nature of the head? A hard nut. When two heads come together they make a big noise. When two hearts come together they melt. That’s why partners don’t call each other, “my sweethead.” They call each other, “my sweetheart” because only the heart can be sweet; the head is miserable. So as long as we use the heart and not the head much, we are safe.
Unfortunately, all over the world, people are using the heads. Look at the different countries—every country has its head. There is no heart in it. The heads come and meet and even in the name of peace they fight. We need the hearts to come together. That’s where the pure love is. If anybody develops that unconditional pure love, free from ego, the heart will remain pure. That’s the reason the Bible says, “Blessed are the pure in heart; they shall see God.” God is visible only through a pure heart, so don’t give too much room for the head.